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Saturday, May 21, 2005

about my trip...

I witnessed and enjoyed many amazing and wonderful things on my journey into the unknown. I can't begin to describe! I think I'll just list a few here.

  • Alligators are far from extinct. I saw many, many interstate alligators everywhere I traveled! (interstate alligator= shredded truck tire carcass, often looks like a real gator crossing the road in the distance)
  • Killing red bulls can make a long drive much more enjoyable.
  • Witnessed the immediate aftermath of a dump truck penetrating a very heavy duty concrete barrier wall in the center of an interstate highway! What a mess! That must have hurt like a bitch!
  • Saw a number of 18 wheelers actually using the correct lane and not impeding faster moving traffic!
  • Got milk? It's even better when you see a giant tank truck full of milk on it's side in a ditch with milk spilling everywhere. (note to self: keep glove box stocked full of Oreos)
  • Observed a number of crack-heads coming and going from the room below me. (like it's not too fukking obvious)

I also had a check list of things I planned on doing during my trip. Let's see how well I did.

( ) Kill Godzilla once and for all. I found out he's hibernating beneath the Sea of Japan and the plane ticket was outside my budget, I'll get you next time you crazy giant lizard!!

(x) Do some camping at the "Y". Hell yeah, what fun. Especially when the grounds are nicely manicured and trim!

(x) Learn to read some braille. This is a wonderful way to get acquainted with women too!

(x) Test drive some new Trojan condoms. They weren't too bad actually but it's still nothing like the real thing.

(x) Switch to the real thing and love it even more! Now we're talking!

(x) Learn new tricks. I'm an old dog, it's never too late!

( ) Visit my favorite Texas bloggers. You know who you are! Sorry guys and gals maybe on the next trip?

(x) Go toe to toe, face to face, heart to heart with the Demon Queen without blinking! woohoo!!!

Hey, looks like I did pretty good on my checklist! Sorry I can't tell you guys the exact location of the Realm, but to me it's not just a distant place anymore. It now exists in my bleeding heart. All in all the trip was a real eye opener to some new possiblities in my life. Thanks for all the sweet well wishes while I was away!!!