<body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/platform.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar.g?targetBlogID\x3d9339269\x26blogName\x3dit\x27s+a+dog\x27s+life\x26publishMode\x3dPUBLISH_MODE_BLOGSPOT\x26navbarType\x3dBLACK\x26layoutType\x3dCLASSIC\x26searchRoot\x3dhttps://se7endog.blogspot.com/search\x26blogLocale\x3den_US\x26v\x3d2\x26homepageUrl\x3dhttp://se7endog.blogspot.com/\x26vt\x3d3930538842568587256', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe", messageHandlersFilter: gapi.iframes.CROSS_ORIGIN_IFRAMES_FILTER, messageHandlers: { 'blogger-ping': function() {} } }); } }); </script>
Thursday, June 16, 2005

If I had my way...

Windows would be a lot more fun. A few things that I think I would just have to change or add on:
  • Automatic updates of all your favorite porn site listings. Why fool around? We all know that the main thing that the internet is good for is porn surfing! Hell yeah!
  • Make an R-Rated version available with different error messages, instead of something like "File Access Denied" you would get instead, "No Way, Fucker!".
  • "Start" button? Too Lame! Label it "Start this Mofo'" instead.
  • "Please Wait" LOL Gimme a break, name that one "Gimme a Minute Fuckhead While I Dig Thru This Pile of Crap!"
  • "Recycle Bin" would become the "Dumpster". Why would you be worried about recycling freekin' electrons?
  • Replace that stupid hourglass with a little hand giving you the birdfinger while you wait or maybe some tiny little porn action for you to watch instead. Selectable for male/female of course!
  • Instead of "Windows Update" name it "This shit is full of security holes AGAIN, m'therfucker, PATCH THIS BITCH UP!"
  • In your email, instead of "Block Sender" name that button instead to read "Kick This Piece of Shit Spam Off My Fucking PC Forever!"
  • Design a program that automatically finds the HOME email of spammers and sends them a thousand nasty emails with photos of their wives taking on a donkey in Tijuana or their husbands taking it up the ass with every guy in a gay bar and then it spreads through their email program, forwarding the pics to all the friends listed in their address book.
  • Instead of a confirmation message that says just simply "OK" it should read "Hell Yeah!" or "Fuck Yeah!" or how about "I have done your evil bidding, Master!"

Those are just a few that I can think of offhand, what modifications would you make to Windows if you ran the show?!?!

posted by se7en at 11:35 AM |